MAY 27, 2025

“Dear Alcohol” – Part 1 (No, I’m not breaking up with you)

Dear Alcohol,

We’ve had quite the journey, haven’t we?

We met a little later in life. I mean, I was still under the legal age, but I was the latest bloomer among my group of high school friends. I was probably the only one to first officially meet you during junior prom weekend. I didn’t love your taste (Bud Light anyone?), but I did enjoy how you made me feel. You were a shy, introverted girl’s dream. 

By the time I got to college, we were definitely way more acquainted. Sometimes you made me sick, oftentimes you made me happy, ALL THE TIME you made me hungry. Proudly, I was able to discriminate between when to say yes to you and when to kick you to the curb. I wouldn’t have been able to graduate at the top of my class without that ability. College was also when I found my first love – in booze, that is. Some days, I believed I’d become Mrs. Jack Daniels. 

As an adult, our relationship didn’t really change much. I relied on you during my first few dates with Mike, mostly to calm my nerves because within minutes, I KNEW I’d become Mrs. Michael Fede (sorry, Jack). I looked forward to spending time with you at family parties and gatherings with friends. I drowned in you over the highs and the lows, and in many moments in between – from the Grenada beaches on my honeymoon, to soaking in the tub over a good book, to coping with the rock of the family slipping into terminal illness. After he passed, it took me months to cancel Daddy’s Gloria Ferrer sparkling wine membership that we gifted him after our Sonoma trip (unbeknownst to us, on his last birthday on this earth). I probably still have a bottle around here somewhere. 

Alcohol, you know our history just as well as I do. We flirted. We were intimate. We went all in. We laughed. We cried. And boy, did we sing and dance! (Someday, I’ll post my karaoke video to “Piano Man”). 

But here’s the thing, Alcohol – I don’t think I ever NEEDED you. I never developed an addiction. When I couldn’t have you, I didn’t miss you…even if you were staring me in the face. 

Now, in my (gasp!) late 30s, as I make myself comfortable on a newfound health path, I can genuinely say this:

I KNOW I DON’T NEED YOU!

I’m no longer that shy, introverted girl walking around Seaside with her prom queen tiara. I’m an open book who shares her happiness and woes with a small corner of the world as a hobby. 

I somehow have fallen in love with a beverage who puts Jack Daniels to shame. One that eases my anxiousness, helps my healing gut, and gives me both physical and mental strength. And guess what? Happy Juice doesn’t include you. 

Without you, I make better decisions about what food goes into my body. I despise how hungry you make me!

Without you, I can still dance like no one is watching and duet with Billy Joel. 

No, I’m not breaking up with you. No, this isn’t an announcement declaring myself sober. 

This is a letter I can save for the future, when I’m at a Memorial Day barbecue for instance. When I have a choice to make about choosing three glasses of wine or among three kinds of Happy Juice flavors. The former WILL lead to me overstuffing myself on bread and dips and brownies, while the latter will put my mind (and waistline) at ease. 

After all, I now work too hard on my diet and fitness to throw it away for a few hours (if that!) of pleasure. 

No, I’m not breaking up with you. But I do think we should see other people. 

Until next time (or next barbecue)…

Your gal,

Mrs. ToniAnne Daniels Fede

For the science nerds like me, read on as I break down the physical, mental, and behavioral consequences of consuming too much alcohol. For those on a health journey who still have a partying prom queen inside them, bookmark this page for future info and motivation!

1. Alcohol’s Impacts on Physical Health

• Empty Calories: Alcohol contains 7 calories per gram with no nutritional benefit. A single drink can add (gasp!) 100–300+ calories, quickly stacking up and stalling weight loss or body composition goals.

• Slowed Metabolism: When you drink, your body prioritizes processing alcohol over burning fat, which can reduce fat metabolism.

• Hormonal Disruption: Alcohol can interfere with hormones like testosterone, estrogen, and cortisol, affecting metabolism, muscle repair, and mood regulation. Yikes!

• Sleep Disruption: While it may make you feel sleepy, alcohol reduces REM sleep and overall sleep quality, which is ESSENTIAL for recovery and mental well-being. Although I haven’t discussed it much, awesome sleep has been one of my favorite benefits to my health journey!

2. Mental and Emotional Effects from Alcohol

• Increased Anxiety or Depression: Alcohol can initially feel like a stress reliever, but over time it may worsen anxiety, depression, and emotional regulation. Talk about counter-effective!

• Decreased Self-Control: It lowers inhibition, making it easier to make impulsive choices that conflict with your health goals (e.g., overeating, skipping workouts). This is probably my worst symptom when drinking. As a recovering binge-eater, this is the LAST thing I need on my health journey. 

3. Behavioral and Lifestyle Consequences of Alcohol

• Disrupts Routines: Drinking, especially socially or heavily, can disrupt sleep schedules, meal planning, and exercise consistency. That patriotic-themed cocktail may be dressed to party, but it is NOT a team player when it comes to my goals, plans, and my sparkly new blog. 

• Affects Decision-Making: Alcohol makes it harder to stick with healthy habits, leading to “I’ll start again on Monday” cycles. Note to self – this is a TOXIC cycle!

Bottom Line

Alcohol doesn’t have to be completely off-limits for everyone, but even moderate consumption can slow or sabotage progress, especially if your goals include fat loss, better sleep, more energy, or improved mood and fitness. If you’re on a health journey, it’s important to be mindful and intentional about when, why, and how much you drink.

Cheers!